Embracing time alone

December 13, 2021 Sandra Dawes

I love Adele. I’ve been listening to her new album, and she has a song with the lyrics:

“Sometimes loneliness is the only rest…”

I couldn’t agree more, though I wouldn’t call it loneliness; I’d just say time alone 😉 As an introvert, Adele is talking my language! I love my friends and family, but too much isn’t good for me. I need time to myself, alone with my thoughts, with any work I need to do and be on my own schedule, even if that means no plan.

My hubby and I are abroad at the moment. He had to go to another part of the island, and I had work to do and chose to stay back. I forgot how different cultures view a woman being on her own, but some people were shocked that I didn’t want to go with him and then confused that I didn’t need visitors to keep me company while he was gone. I always find it funny when people don’t understand my comfort with being alone.

You might not know that I grew up an only child if you’re new to my blog, but I did. Maybe growing up without siblings has made time to myself more sacred? As an introvert, being around too many people for too long is exhausting, and I need time to refresh and recharge. Before the pandemic, when I would go to significant events with 100+ people, I would need a day at home afterwards. I almost felt like I experienced a people energy hangover after large events. 

I don’t consider myself anti-social, but I am mindful of who I share my energy with it how much I’m willing to give. Perhaps I am a tad anti-social because if given a choice to stay home or go out, I will choose to stay at home most of the time. I don’t mind being social with others, but it’s not something I need. I guess that’s why I didn’t mind the pandemic and the stay-at-home orders – they just gave me an excuse to do what I wanted to do anyway 😉

I understand that we’re not all wired the same, and some of us struggle with being by ourselves. I think you can enjoy spending time with people, but you should be comfortable on your own. I’m not advocating becoming a hermit or anything. Still, I know from experience that when people don’t enjoy their own company, they can seek the company of others in an unhealthy way.

I also understand that part of the discomfort with me being by myself in this situation is because I’m a woman in a foreign land. Seeing a woman on her own far from home can make people uncomfortable. As someone who has travelled on her own twice without any problems, I get the safety concerns, but they aren’t worries I have. I choose to focus on all the things I can do, including doing nothing, while being on my own and enjoying it. 

When was the last time you had time alone? Do you enjoy it, or does it make you uncomfortable? Let me know in the comments! ♥

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