I went to visit my mom last week for her birthday. She’s been in the same house that we moved into in 1994. It’s a four-bedroom house with a decent front and back yard. It’s a lot of space for one woman, but she refuses to let go of it. She has a tenant in the basement, and they spend time together sometimes.
After speaking with her last week, I realized that she stays in the house, not because of the memories the home holds but the memories that the neighbors have. So many people who live in my mother’s neighborhood have been there since before my father passed away. They remember him; they share memories with my mother. She knows that if she moves, the new neighbors won’t know anything about her awesome husband.
I do get that the memories aren’t the same for people who have never met my father. They will only hear stories from other people sharing their experiences with him. But nothing beats the real thing, does it?
I wish that we had made better use of my father’s camcorder. I have the camcorder, but I don’t have any of the videos that my dad recorded on it. It would be pretty cool to have video footage of him. Even audio would be nice. I feel like the sound of his voice is fading from my memory 🙁
I may be biased, but I think that men like my father are hard to find. While growing up, I was always aware that I was lucky to have the father I did. In fact, I’m pretty sure my friends would remind me to make sure I didn’t forget.
There are times that I still struggle with the fact that he isn’t here in physical form to experience some of my wins with me. But I do believe that he has been guiding me since he’s been gone, and I’m pretty sure he’s had moments where he’s been super-proud and other times where he’s shaking his head 😉
I hope there has been more laughter than tears, and I hope that his overall feeling is one of pride. I will always be proud to be his daughter and continue to be guided by the desire to continue making him proud. ♥